In the AM on Oct 31 I was 214.
I made a healthy chili for dinner, as tradition. This year thankfully the candy monster was no longer in me, but I did reserve a Milky Way (full sized) for my enjoyment.
The night before, however, I had a full sized 3 Musketeer bar, figuring it was okay since it was lowest in calories and fat. But come on, it's a candy holiday!
Now while I didn't over indulge in the candy, I may have gone overboard with the carbs.
DH made some YUMMY corn bread to go with the chili. I couldn't believe I ate 2½ squares of the stuff. Later I had a bowl of popcorn with butter and seasonings, no low-fat or low sodium stuff. I also had a couple pieces from a Runts pack. Those are one of my favorite fruity/sweet candies but I only eat them maybe once a year and that of course is on Halloween.
I was pretty much so stuffed I couldn't eat a whole lot. I only ate half of my Milky Way and then gave the rest to DH, LOL
But on Sunday morning I weighed 216.8.
Yeah I know I did it to myself, and it was a one day indulgence so I didn't think the scale would go down or stay the same, LOL But I feel like the animation, like I just blew myself up.I'm fine though and today I started fresh and stayed away from all of the carbs. I had my Atkins shake, plenty of tuna, and some chicken today. I don't think the scale will magically drop the nearly 3lbs I added in one day, but certainly, one can hope, right?! LOL
Seriously though, I am hoping to be at 205-206 by Thanksgiving. Ideally I would LOVE to be 199 by T-day, but I don't think that is realistic anymore. I'm gonna aim for 196 by Christmas instead or at least by New Years Day.
The holiday trifecta is the worst for a fatty or even former fatty. I know in the past usually by the week before Halloween I completely ignore the scale until January 1st rolls around.
This year will really be a challenge for me. I am hosting Thanksgiving, and then 2 weeks later I am hosting a Holiday party. I do a LOT of traditional baking and so the treats and temptations will be abundant.
However, since my surgery my cravings have nearly disappeared completely, or you could say my will power was increased dramatically. I find it so much easier to say "No" to chocolate, candy, pies, cakes, junk food in general. In the past and before surgery it was nearly impossible and I'd rationalize my way into eating the "no-no" food, one way or another.
I think because I did pay money to have this surgery and so many know about it, I don't want to fail! I don't want to fail my family and have them say "Look not even surgery worked for her!" nor do I want to find myself saying that nor do I want my husband saying that (fyi: he thinks I am getting "too" skinny for him already!). I want to prove to myself, my father, my family, my children, and anyone else that this surgery works and worked for me, and I worked my surgery/tool the best I damn well could!
I want to be at or near goal by my 1 year surgiversary, and I really should be there at this rate. My weight loss has slowed down to be around 10lbs a month now and I have 6 months to go and I have around 65lbs left to lose. So I could realistically be just that close to goal, unless I stall. Hell I'll consider myself a "success" when I can fit into a size 12 or 10 jeans! I'm only 2-3 sizes away from that right now! Hell, I'll be successful if I can weigh what my DH weighs! I'm only 40lbs away from that one! LOL
Any ways, that is my confession, and I don't feel guilty, just gluttonous. I felt so full and yucky from all of the bad food the night before that on Sunday I still felt yucky and kind of full still. Even NOW my tongue still feels nasty. blech.
Any ways, I am on the road to "recovery" from Halloween's junk fest. Even now, for the whole day, I've only "gained" .2 oz so in the AM I should be down more. This AM 216.8 now I am 217 so in the Morning I should be down hopefully a pound. (fingers crossed)
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